Satire Idea

So I think for my satire I'm gonna write about texting and the whole spelling dilemma. Between t9 on regular phones and the spell check on smart phones, you either don't need to know how to spell, or you understand what other people are saying when they write ahdfhhfa. I know I've made all kind of mistakes when texting...like one time Emy, Carla, and me were trying to make plans for something and I texted Emy, "yeah, carla has aids" instead of "yeah, carla has cheer", because aids and cheer can switch with each other quite easily on t9. That is how rumors get started. And everyone knows when their screen says "duck" or "ducking", they are actually dropping the f bomb. So basically I think my paper is going to be a texting conversation between me and a friend, where nothing actually makes sense, but if you're a fellow texter you will understand.

Davis is about to release the truth behind twitter users

I, through hours of thought, have come up with the idea to satirize twitter, which is already very satirical in itself. Twitter ties into basically everything in today's world, and it make me want to stuff a baby into one of those pneumatic t-shirt cannons (you know, the ones that launch t-shirts to the upper deck of Major league baseball stadiums) and send that sucker to Utah. I hope to cover ever ridiculous edge to twitter and the people that are completely contained in their fake, online, celebrity persona that captures the true stupidity of their actually uneventful lives.

Wolf Gang.

Mary Jauna Burger and Fries

This is one paragraph of my satire.... its virtually about drug abuse and the why people must have drugs in order to be content. I will either present it as a boring piece of paper, create virtual med cards and on the back instead of laws and regulations have each paragraph, or several munchies food bags along with it and post ingredients on the back from a new print out that says ingredients and health concerns (or non-concerns)

However I also started a satire on girls who either lack confidence in themselves or find attention through sexual desire. this may be a little too mean.. but could be represented in a burn book like in mean girls..

(sorry my topics are dergatory take no offense they are just opinions)

Food tastes better, smells better and is consumed with more joy. So why don’t people all smoke a bowl before Thanksgiving dinner? That is a hard question to answer, maybe simply because people would rather spend a meal time feeling heart-warmed by their family members verses internally debating about weather the fly on the wall will reincarnate into a lion in the next twenty four hours since flies only live for twenty four hours on average. Some intellectual capacity is actually needed and most times appreciated at meal times. Munchies, the mental barrier to how wonderful food intensifies savory flavors and is the high at the mental state adds to the vibrancy of a total wicked experience. Mary Jane feeds off of any food and will constantly be shouting in your head, “Mary Jauna Burger and Fries, a pizza and twelve milkshakes.”

Satire- Fast Food

I was thinking of satirizing the fast food industry.

I would poke fun at the nutrition factor. And when you drive through a city and see a Micky D's there dive-thru line goes thru the parking lot so soon the cars have to go down a block to another. When you drive down a main street there are at least three fast food restaurants on each block. It seems as if everything unhealthy for you is extremely convenient, and tasty. And its all because everything is fried in a boat load of grease.
I could talk about how since the economy is tanking that is the only food they can afford.
Or about how fast food is good for you because it keeps you from looking so skinny and unhealthy. And maybe one day being chunky will be the new skinny.

Maybe I could tell a story of some ignorant white person who is out in the Sahara looking for some fast food. He sees some starved Africans with balloted bellies and asks where he can find a Burger King.

I could either write it as a menu, and ad, or something else.

What are your thoughts?

Women, Men, and Telluride

I see a lot of stereotypes living in telluride. One big one is that all the boys are lazy, pot smoking losers. This is only half true. And the half that live up to the stereotype are dumb and have no life. However, there are many boys in this town who are hidden behind the boys who do bad things. Its sad to see how one big stereotype can over rule. Another stereotype for women in this town is that we arnt as good at sports or as strong as the boys. Well the truth is I see half the amount of boys then girls in the weight room. A lot of them would much rather smoke then get strong and be fit.

There are stereotypes not just on men and women individually but as a whole gender stereotype in Telluride. One big stereotype that many people put with "people in Telluride" is that we are either pot smoking, no shower taking hippies or Rich snobby, designer wearing people. One time when we were playing basketball in Dove Creek, my step dad got in a fight with a DC dad. He was cussing and saying that we were "tree huggers". Im tired of stereotypes, why dont people just live there life and not worry about how other people are living theres. Stereotypes have been alive since the beginning of man. This is something that shouldnt carry on into the future but probably will.

Blogs are for loosurs

The other day I woke up and went out to judge and subjugate women. I didn’t brush my teeth or take a showur or wash my face. Even in France I would have been considered smelly. I put on some ratty old clothes over my well-used underwear that hadn’t been changed for quite a while. I did take the effert to turn them inside out, so that got at least another week of use out of them. I decided to go to school, but showed up an hour late cause being on time is for loosurs.

In my first class, I sat down and stretched my body out of the chair to take up as much room as possible. I didn’t do my homework because I was way too busy playing Xbox the night before; doing homework is for losers.

The rest of the day I slacked off and thought about what I was going to do after school that day. It was a Friday, so my friends and I were planning to get down that night. Whenever the teacher asked me a question, I shrugged and let some nerd answer it. Paying attention in class is for losers.

After school I went and met up with my bro’s. It was a crazy night, we got toatally wasted and it was awesome. We do this every Friday, but it never gets old. Sometimes some loser confronts me and I tell them that doing well in school is for losers. I can always copy off somebody anyway, and if I ever need to write a paper I can just bullsh*t it and use spll check. Spelling rite is for losers anywy.

Weirdley, nobody ever really brought up my situation before as being a typical slacker mail before some square English teacher told us to write a blog about it. But blogging is for losers

WoMEN

Females, women, whatever you would like to call them, have always been dominated by men. Their fragile bodies were unfit for working in the fields, tasks only the strong, muscular men could perform. Yes, hundreds of years ago this might have been the case, but times have changed. Women can do the same tasks as men, yet, they are still viewed as weak and incompetent creatures. There is a much larger percent of women working at a desk compared to men. Both are equally qualified, but it still seems that women are better at their dainty jobs. When it comes to children, women have always been the ones to take care of them, while their husbands bring home the bacon. Did it ever occur to the man that maybe his wife doesn’t want to be stuck at home with their four crying children? Each parent should take equal care of the child that they both created together, not leaving the dainty job for the woman simply because its tradition. Women are known to be bad drivers. Although this remains true for certain individuals who actually are a safety hazard, there is almost an equal ratio of men who are also bad drivers. Even the simple words that describe someone’s gender set women lesser to men. Man, male, and men are all found in forms of a womans, or Females gender. A person’s gender does not define who they are or who they will become, and it should not. Cultures around the world have made this decision for every single person, and simply because they were born a girl or a boy. Let that individual decide for themselves whether they want to work with heavy machinery or design clothes for a living.